If you have't noticed, the content of this blog is heavy. I can't help that. Divorce sucks and single parenting is hard. But, to bring a little balance (and because I'm a goofball in real life) I've started Fun Fridays here at the blog. Finally, Friday will offer more promise than the latest episode of 20/20! And yes, I'm a loser...
Today's post is courtesy of Facebook. I have a love/hate relationship with this phenomenon, but I also have some hilarious "friends" and even more hilarious conversations. It's also courtesy of my two sisters, Amy and Vicki, who make me look tame, if you can believe that.
Here's a little background: Well-meaning people are always trying to point out single men to me. One day, while doing her gift registry at Babies R Us, my sister says "Oooh, Sarah, there's a cute single guy over there...without a ring." I just stared at her. "Amy..." I replied, "single men do NOT shop at Babies R Us." In her one blessed year of marriage, she had forgotten the obvious. My mom is the worst though, and our conversations are usually like this:
Mom: Oh, Sarah, there's a cute guy in your church's bulletin!
Sarah: (Rolling eyes). Yes, I've seen him in real life . He might actually be shorter than me. (I'm 5'1" on a good day...so a shorter man is very short)
Mom: But, he's a pilot!! He'll be gone most of the week. And they make good money.
Sarah: Money won't buy him height.
Mom: Ugh, you're SO picky!
Dad (in his thick Brooklyn accent. Picture a younger Frank Barone...seriously): Celierrr - I wish you wouldn't be trying to do dat. I don't like dat!
The places that people tell me to meet guys are hilarious, so I asked for feedback from my fb friends (mostly my other sisters because no one "got" it), and compiled a list of the top ten places you won't (or shouldn't) find a man. Feel free to add to the list!
- Baby stores or baby showers. Not happening, ladies. If it's too good to be true...
- Free health clinic
- Prison penpal program (I DIED when my sister said this hahaha)
- MySpace - Because it's not 2006.
- Victoria's Secret - If he's single and shopping there...he's either weird or shopping for his mother. Which still makes him weird.
- Child support enforcement office - Whatever story he has to explain it, it sucks.
- Court - Thanks to my need for speed, I've been to traffic court. It gave me the willies.
If you have an idea for Fun Friday, send it my way! Happy weekend, peeps!